Amy Duggar Reflects on Shallow Cousin Relationships Growing Up

Amy Duggar recently opened up about her relationships with her cousins, describing them as predominantly surface-level during her childhood. In a candid discussion on Matt and Abby Howard’s podcast, “Unplanned,” she reflected on the impact of family dynamics and the teachings of the Institute in Basic Life Principles (IBLP) on these connections.

During her appearance on December 10, Duggar, 39, stated, “We would spend so much time together. We had tons of trips, all the stuff, but it was more surface-level. It wasn’t really heartfelt.” She emphasized the lack of deeper conversations within her family, noting, “We never really talked about the things we were struggling with or what God was doing in our life.” Instead, interactions were limited to casual greetings and small talk, such as comments on clothing or the weather.

Duggar highlighted the influence of IBLP teachings on her cousins, suggesting that these guidelines fostered emotional distance. “They teach, like, if you’re not in that circle, they keep you at arm’s reach,” her husband, Dillon King, added during the podcast. This perspective sheds light on the complexities within the Duggar family, which is known for its strict adherence to certain religious principles.

Family Dynamics and Modesty Standards

Amy also shared anecdotes about her experiences with modesty expectations when visiting her cousins. Although she often opted for jeans, there were instances when she was asked to wear skirts to comply with their standards. “I’ve tried on pantaloons before. I’ve tried on one of their swimsuits,” she recounted. “Just to, like, appease my family and to show that I do respect their values and their rules.”

She also recalled her husband Dillon’s initial encounter with her cousins, which was marked by awkwardness due to his unfamiliarity with their family rules. “We were at this, like, rock and bowl place. It was like glow bowling,” she said. “All my cousins were bowling, and they don’t dance, right? So, when he first met them, he walked in, and there was some music playing, and he was like, dancing and just cracking up.” Amy noted that her family members exchanged uncomfortable glances rather than welcoming him.

Gaining Closer Connections Over Time

Despite her earlier experiences, Amy has developed a closer relationship with her cousin Jill Duggar over the years. In her comments, she described their cousinship as a source of joy, stating, “Cousinship is so much fun. Like, we can joke around and laugh and we have inside jokes.” She contrasted her relationship with Jill to her childhood experiences, noting, “It’s such a different way of living compared to really what we had growing up.”

Amy also spoke about her need to establish boundaries with her family, driven by the challenges posed by their dynamics. “I realized I needed to have boundaries set with my family and the situation because of the lies and things that were told,” she explained. She clarified that her feelings were not directed at her cousins but were a result of the broader family environment.

In recent disclosures, Amy revealed that she last spoke to her uncle Jim Bob Duggar shortly before his son Josh’s trial in 2021. Josh Duggar was sentenced to over 12 years in prison for receiving and possessing child pornography, an event that has had significant repercussions for the Duggar family.

As Amy Duggar continues to navigate her relationships within her family, her reflections provide insight into the challenges and complexities of growing up within a prominent family shaped by strict religious teachings.