New Year Resolutions: A Humorous Look at Dieting Commitments

As the New Year unfolds, many individuals set resolutions, often focused on health and self-improvement. For Irv Erdos, a freelance humor columnist, the process began with a promise to his wife to create a meaningful list of commitments for the year ahead. However, the light-hearted exchange quickly revealed the humorous challenges of sticking to such resolutions, particularly regarding dietary changes.

Erdos started his list with the intention of giving up alcohol, only to be met with laughter from his wife. “You don’t even drink,” she pointed out, suggesting that his commitment to abstain was more of an empty gesture. After a playful debate, he shifted his focus to quitting smoking, which was met with the same skepticism as his first resolution.

With the couple’s New Year’s Day celebrations approaching, Erdos found himself at a lavish feast hosted by their friends, Carol and Frank Crisci. The event featured a wide array of culinary delights, including a large glazed ham, various deli meats, shrimp cocktail, and an impressive selection of desserts. Guests contributed their own specialties, adding to the festive atmosphere and making it clear that dieting would take a back seat for the day.

The Crisci’s home, surrounded by a garden filled with colorful koi and fruit trees, created a picturesque setting for the celebration. Among the unique plant life was the Buddha’s Hand tree, known for its unusual fruit often used in culinary decorations. This vibrant environment set the stage for a joyous gathering, where food and friendship reigned supreme.

After the New Year’s Day festivities, Erdos faced the reality of his dietary commitments, now under the watchful eye of his wife. The new diet included a strict regimen: no red meat, potatoes, or sugary treats. Fish was permitted only if it was not breaded or fried, while chicken could only be enjoyed if baked or broiled. Breakfast options were limited to boiled or poached eggs, eliminating toast and cereals entirely.

Despite the sacrifices, Erdos noted only a modest weight loss after two weeks. His wife remained steadfast, insisting that perseverance would yield further results. With a touch of humor, he reflected on statistics that suggested he might reach his ideal weight three years beyond his life expectancy, highlighting the often comedic struggle of maintaining New Year’s resolutions.

In a light-hearted conclusion, Erdos wished readers a Happy New Year, sharing the ups and downs of his resolution journey. The commitment to healthier living may have begun with enthusiasm, but the realities of diet restrictions and the joy of shared meals left a lasting impression.

Erdos’ experiences resonate with many as they navigate their own resolutions, reminding us that while commitment is important, enjoying life’s pleasures is equally essential. Those interested in his humorous take on life can reach him at [email protected].